Apr. 16th, 2006

oneirophrenia: (Blue Me)
You know...there's no shame in just giving up sometimes.

Especially when you know you've screwed something up so badly there's simply no way of repairing it.

The heart of the Socratic method is to know one's self--to know what you are capable of, and to know what you flatout can't do. That way, you can practice and magnify your strengths, and avoid and/or work around your weaknesses. Some weaknesses, obviously, can be overcome with a little practice, too...but a smart person will identify those things he can never, ever achieve so as to put them out of mind and not worry about them anymore.

What I know I can do, and will always be able to do well:

1. Teach
2. Write music/prose
3. Sleep

What I know I cannot do, and will never be able to do right:

1. Shoot pool
2. Make a decent living
3. Love someone

I'm not wasting anymore time whatsoever on those last three. I've about as much a chance of making a go of any of them as I do of walking to Mars.

Now, I'm a hella good teacher, if I do say so myself (hey, six years of great student performances and great class/faculty reviews have prettymuch convinced me that, yeah, I really know what I'm doing here). People really dig my music and writing. And I've been averaging 12 hours of sleep per day. I KNOW I can do this stuff well, but can always do it better if I devote myself to it. So, yeah...that's what I plan on doing.

I mean...what the hell else do I have to do with my time?
oneirophrenia: (Hahaha)

Thank the gods I've never had to deal with this.
oneirophrenia: (Marv)
I've been listening to oldskool goth stuff all day. The Cure. Depeche Mode. Sisters of Mercy. Red Lorry Yellow Lorry. A Drop in the Gray.

And I just realized that The Cure's "Boys Don't Cry" is hitting a little too close to the heart right now.

Shit. I'm going to watch Capote. Now there's a guy whose life was about 10x more scorched than mine will ever be. Of course, he was also about a 1000x more successful than I am, but ohwell...I've plenty of time left to write my own In Cold Blood, or the musical equivalent thereof.


oneirophrenia: (Default)

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