The Chemistry of Love

Italian scientists have identified that the powerful (and blinding, and maddening, and soul-destroying) feelings of falling passionately in love with someone are triggered by a molecule known as Neural Growth Factor (NGF).

But...after a year with the same lover, quantities of NGF in the blood return to normal levels. So that explains why every relationship I've ever been in winds down about then.

Now, hopefully, they'll find a way to control release of NGF. I want to make goddamned sure it remains at an even keel at all times. Fuck this "love" shit. Fuck it right in its ass.

But--this is cool--I have the title for the last and final Malpractice song: Neural Growth Factor! WEEEEEEEE!

Ladies and gentlemen...the Quantum Byte!

That's right, folks: Austrian scientists have produced the first quantum byte! That is, for you nerdally challenged, eight qubits. We've got the qubyte, now!

This is a major step forward in quantum computing--which is still in its infancy, yet showing more promise every damned six weeks. The Singularity starts here, people. Next thing you know, it'll be talking to us.

Your SomethingAwful.com Quote(s) of the Day:

From Today's Fashion Swat article--

"'Emotionally transgendered' is pretty much the definition I think of
when I derisively call someone a faggot. You can throw dicks up asses
all you want, you can be Carson from Queer Eye in a faded pink
Morrissey shirt, but you're just gay. This guy is a fucking faggot."

BONUS! For inmostlight

"It could be any black guy on the planet and he would probably end up
apologizing for getting mad. It could be a black midget cripple on an
iron lung and he would get tingling race fear up his spine. Like any
minute a bunch of Crips covered in keloid scars are going to swoop in
on zip lines and beat him to death with bars of solid crack."

AND HOLY SHIT! There's another one!

"This is the last thing a chicken sees before it gets fucked to death."

People! Are you spiritually healthy?

Why not find out, using RaptureReady.com's handy-dandy Spiritual Health Quiz Thing

Naturally, I was led immediately to the "There is no God" page, which contains the following text:

In most cases, the rejection of the Creator does not result from
logical conclusions. The average atheist, if he or she is honest, will
cite an emotional motivation for lack of faith in God.

The late Isaac Asimov once wrote: “Emotionally I am an atheist. I don’t
have the evidence to prove that God doesn’t exist, but I so strongly
suspect that he doesn’t that I don’t want to waste my time.” Now that
Mr. Asimov is dead, I suspect he wishes he would have invested time
into proving the existence of God.

Most people who do not think God exists betray their stance by arguing
with Him. If God is not real, there is no need to be hostile toward Him
or toward anyone who believes in Him.

I have no emotional motivation in disbelieving in God--quite frankly, I wish there was one, to make life easier. But that just isn't so--therefore, I make do with what there is.

However, the final paragraph brings up a very interesting quandary: If God is not real--and he isn't--is there any reason whatsoever for an atheist to be actively hostile toward believers? The answer to that is obviously no: I am certainly not hostile toward believers because they express a faith in a God that I, individually, don't believe in. Their faith is irrelevant to me, and I'm not about to criticize anyone for simply believing in God--my friends who are one sort of Christian or another know this. What brings out the hostility in me, and as you well know I am chock full of hostility, is how some people express their faith. By trying to justify it day in and day out. By utilizing it as an ankle-chain to hold humanity back from advancing properly. By forcing it on those who want no part of it. There is nothing inherently bad about believing in a god--though I myself find it to be a little silly--but there is a LOT inherently bad with using that belief as a means of hampering others' various pursuits of what is meaningful for them.

Blastaphemous!?

Is it blasphemous to say that Devo's best song ever is actually "Weird Al" Yankovic's "Dare to be Stupid"?

Well...it may not be Devo's best, but it's definitely Weird Al's best. Fondly do I remember the day that the Dare to be Stupid album came out when I was in fifth grade. I bought it immediately--on vinyl--and did nothing but play the title-track nonstop for eight months. Everyone on earth, even my mother, knew right then and there is was the true Pegritz Theme Song. It later became the Werewolves of Uniontown Unofficial Theme Song as well because...well, that's what we did. We didn't dare to be stupid, actually--we just WERE stupid!

Just remember: Mashed potatos can be your friends.

Ohyes, while we're on the subject of Weird Al....

How many of you fucktards think I should include a cover of "Like a Surgeon" as the "hidden track" on Malpractice?