Why, it's DARK! But it MATTERS!

[oneirophrenia]

First direct evidence of dark matter observed.

Dark matter is awesome. It's fucking everywhere--literally (perhaps even in your basement)--but know one knows what the hey it even is. Hoorah for cosmic conundrums!

Comments

[aidinslevel.livejournal.com]

We know it exists in my scary ass basement!!

[oneirophrenia.livejournal.com]

TOTALLY! That's what that stuff in the corner was--dark matter!

You know...that would make a fun short story, now that I think about it. I mean, dark matter *is* supposed to be everywhere, so why *wouldn't* there be some chillin' in a big ol' heap in somebody's basement?

[aidinslevel.livejournal.com]

You can add in how the dark matter hangs with the centipedes that are in war with the spiders down there and the ghosts use the dark matter as a bouncing board to go from dimension to dimension...

Oh holly hell, I should become a writer...HA!

[oneirophrenia.livejournal.com]

What if the spooks in the basement are entirely *made* of dark matter, and they have discovered a way to cross the baryonic/dark-matter divide with their mind-force and are now controlling the centipedes, because so far they've only been able to grab control of very low-level, simple lifeforms?

Holy shit, I totally see a cult movie in the making here.

[inmostlight.livejournal.com]

Hmm. So if dark matter is everywhere, and also Jesus is everywhere, I bet the two are related.

A much better headline for that article would have been "Jesus detected being crushed in galactic collision!"