oneirophrenia: (Berzerk2)
[personal profile] oneirophrenia
Scientists finally have some direct, physical observations that may explain what dark matter is.

But I have my own theory, based on observations conducted during the Super Bowl last night.

I suspect that Jerome Bettis may, in fact, be composed partially of dark matter. After all, dark matter is incredibly massive but only weakly interacts with gravity and baryonic (or normal) matter. This would help explain why A) Bettis can be the size of a public transportation vehicle and yet move on his feet as though he massed no more than me; and B) it usually takes at least four opposing defensive linemen (all of whom are, presumably, composed primarily of baryonic matter) to stop Bettis. I believe this question could be answered should Jerome Bettis donate a small amount of tissue to CERN for testing in their supercollider.

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